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President's Letter
May 2010
May – hmmm...mothers, flowers, sunshine, springtime, AGM (Annual General Meeting), membership, fellowship. This month, it's the word 'membership' that intrigues me and makes me examine the labels we use for people. In our UUFP Directory, I see mentioned 'members’ and ‘friends’ but then there are other people who have neither of those labels attached! What does that mean? I often use the term ‘participant' and we greet ‘visitors’ and ‘first time visitors’ at our services. Are we so complex?
Members can vote at our Annual General Meeting (May 9) but anyone with ties to our fellowship is welcome to attend. Becoming a member of UUFP is as simple as signing our membership book, an action which confirms “sympathy with the purpose and convictions” of our fellowship. However, there are plenty of people who might feel that “sympathy with the purpose and convictions” but who have not chosen to become members. Some regularly attend Sunday services or one of the various smaller groups that meet monthly, or even volunteer significantly. So degree of involvement in our fellowship isn’t equivalent to being a member.
Of course, becoming a member of any religious organization demands some serious thought, as it’s a meaningful decision, no matter how light the external consequences. Here at UUFP, membership “imposes only those obligations you wish it to”. There is no financial or pragmatic obligation linked to membership, no credo to recite, no personal statement to make. The UUFP is what WE are: that which I seek from this community will result from that which I put into it. We hope that members will see their membership as a commitment to that which we share and create together, and will therefore contribute as they are able, to make our fellowship ever healthier and dynamic.
The best time to become a member is so very personal, as was the decision to attend that first Sunday service, or the decision to show up for a second service, to volunteer on a project, or to join one of the small groups within the fellowship. One of our newer members told me recently that he wanted to have a say in the direction and decisions of our fellowship. I joined four years ago because I felt at home and knew that I’d be coming regularly, so it felt right to become a ‘member’. Hopefully, all who are attracted to the principles and purposes of the Unitarian Universalist movement, and who are looking for a place to share that interest with others, will find their place within our fellowship, regardless of how they name themselves.
Our ‘UUFP Directory’ -- which will be updated soon and distributed at our June service -- lists the people who play a part in the life of our fellowship. Members and ‘Friends’, local participants and those who have moved far away, we are a complex mix of people.
In fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
April 2010
And we’re off to the annual Spring EUU retreat, joining together with fellowships found in other cities in Europe, and individuals found ‘at large’, far from organized fellowships such as ours. This will be my fourth EUU retreat in about as many years, so the newness of it all is less important than the anticipation of some of my favorite moments: singing in the choir, walking outside at a new location, listening to talks by other adults who wish to share something interesting…
Recalling my first such retreat leads me to recall my first visit to UUFP, and the strangeness of it all…the feelings of being so new and as yet unconnected as well as ignorant of what goes on in this community. It’s a common set of feelings for almost all of us, whenever we embark on a new job, a new social activity, a new town.
Some recent newcomers to UUFP recently made suggestions of what they would like to see at UUFP. A few of those suggestions have been put in place, to make sure that we all notice and remember that our fellowship is ever-changing, and to remind us all that we all began as ‘newcomers’ at one point or another.
Let’s remember this, as we plan upcoming events, whether at the retreat or at home in Paris. Each of us who is active does so because of some sense of belonging. Let’s all look for opportunities to extend our welcome and to widen our circles, to make space for the newcomers in our midst.
In fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
March 2010
When I was a student at university, I was in the habit of sharing my enthusiasm for whatever I was studying. Once, after an animated attempt to explain molecular control of something or other within cells, a dear aunt asked me, "Doesn't learning all that scientific stuff take away the awe, the pleasure, the beauty of the living things you’re studying?" My answer was immediate -- "No, not at all!" Learning about how living things function down to the smallest scale, was (and still is) so fascinating, so complex, so very amazing…so awesome. My aunt’s question is my earliest memory of awareness that some people perceive a conflict between science and religion. Later, when I became a high school biology teacher in the United States, the conflict became a real phenomenon, with Charles Darwin’s ideas at its heart.
This month, I’ve been reflecting on Darwin and his revolutionary and far-reaching theory. When Darwin published "The Origin of Species" in 1859, he did so in a world much less secular than ours. Whether his decisions about when to publish were influenced by religious concerns of his time is an interesting question. I wonder if the anti-evolutionary currents that exist in the United States now would have shocked Darwin and his contemporaries as much as they astound most of the Europeans I speak with? And would the highly secular scientific world--sometimes quite antagonistic to religion--be equally shocking?
Seeking different views on the relationship between science and religion, I came across an old ‘friend’ from earlier days. American paleontologist and science historian Stephen J. Gould (1941-2002) wrote extensively on evolutionary theory, making it accessible to general audiences. He also wrote extensively about science and religion in the context of 'Creationism' and near the end of his life, developed and wrote about how "science and religion do not glower at each other...[but] interdigitate in patterns of complex fingering.” (from "Rock of Ages", by Gould).
For Gould, science and religion are completely separate domains, with exclusive ways of looking at the world: science seeking to answer questions of “what” and “how” in our concrete world and religion with questions of meaning and morality. Both are about understanding, but in different ways. Gould was not a UU but this image makes me think of the multifaceted ways we approach understanding within our tradition.
Another thinker and writer well known in this area of intersection between science and religion was Thomas Berry (1914-2009), Catholic priest, “cosmologist and geologian.” It seems that for Berry, science and religion are inseparable, with “a deep understanding of the history and functioning of the evolving universe as necessary inspiration and guide for our own effective functioning as individuals and as a species.” I’m reminded of our affirmation in UU of the interconnectedness of all aspects of existence.
Years ago, someone pointed how strange it is that one can be awestruck in the face of the universe while at the same time pursuing logical understanding of that same universe. I could offer to that person both Gould’s entangled strands of separate domains of thinking and Barry’s view of an integrated whole. But sometimes it is so much simpler to just say…Yes, there it is…isn’t that wonderfully strange?
In fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
President's Letter
February 2010
I've been thinking a lot about light. But don't worry -- this isn't another 'the days are getting longer' message, nor is it about metaphorical meanings of light. It's actually quite scientific. For the last month and a half, I've been teaching middle-school children about light...or rather, I have been leading them to discover key concepts about it, through experimentation. And though I am firmly in a science mode while working at school, I always have on my shoulder another mind that is noticing the wider meaning of what we discover in class.
The work we do together is very concrete, which allows the students to develop their own ideas through simple observations about the world around us. And not a day goes by without a torrent of new questions spurred by the latest classroom activity. "So, light travels in a straight line, but what about black holes bending light?" "Is black a color or not?" "Can we put a rainbow of colors back together to make white light?" Sometimes I have answers, sometimes I have ways for them to answer themselves, and sometimes I get to compliment the student on a fascinating question that I'd love to investigate myself. It's easy to model 'open-minded learning' to my students when confronted with my own ignorance on a regular basis. They have such good questions.
Seeing something -- something that has been present all along -- but seeing it differently, is where this study of light has recently brought the class. You've probably experience something like this: Just the other day, I saw my neighborhood carrefour from an angle that recalled the very first time I saw it 11 years ago...and how different it looked! For a moment, I was able to flip back and forth between two different views of exactly the same objects in front of my eyes. Every time I experience this, I am reminded that what I take for granted as 'real' is really just an image in my head. And that's a useful grounding tool.
It happened again just this past week in class, when a simple diagram shown to my students confused them. They said it was wrong, and after listening to them and looking closely, I had to agree -- the illustrator of the diagram had made a mistake. I held this lofty opinion until the following day, when a sole student disagreed with all of us. And she proceeded to show us all how, in fact, the diagram WAS correct if you just looked at it slightly differently. That was humbling. But I recovered quickly (we all make mistakes) and took the opportunity to ask my students where seeing really happens.
There are scientific answers to that question, and that's what we'll explore next in my science class. But of course there is also the metaphorical, the social and interpersonal, and moral and ethical...all those equally interesting ways of looking at the world that I enjoy exploring with my family and friends, and within our UU fellowship. I am thankful that we are a fellowship of open-minded seekers, explorers and discoverers, and that there is room in our lives for shifting perceptions, for questioning what we think we have 'seen' and what we know is 'real' or 'true'. At our service this February, the Rev. John Harley will speak "In Praise of our Uncertainties" and will lead a Saturday museum experience: "Windows into ourselves - finding insights through being with art". I'm sure that my musings on light have been focused in part through the lens of my expectations about those two experiences. As we move through this cold month of February, as the winter holds onto us, I hope that you might be pleasantly surprised by a vision that shifts, revealing something you never thought of or perceived before. I'm keeping my 'eyes' open, too. There's always something new to discover.
In fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
President's Letter
January 2010
Today -- January 6th -- was the first day that I noticed more light at 5 o'clock. I distinctly remember a very dark 5 o'clock moment on a similar Wednesday, just three weeks ago. Now, I happen to like the darkness. There is a certain peacefulness in the quiet of a dark day. But today, I was heartened. I love this kind of winter moment! Despite the cold, despite the darkness, there is this hint of hope and a reminder that the Earth is still moving along its age-old path around the Sun. We have begun emerging (once again) from the dark cave that surrounds this end of the year.
No matter what we do -- well or poorly -- the Earth keeps turning. That's a reassuring thought! The seasons keep changing. We keep living. People keep smiling or grumping. Things keep breaking, and getting lost, and becoming found, sometimes fixed. For some of us who try a little too hard to control our lives (and sometimes the lives of others, as my daughter daily reminds me), it's helpful to remember that it is not necessary to try so hard to make it all turn out "right". Because in fact, it seems that how things turn out in the bigger scheme of things isn't really under my control. Apparently. Much of the time.
But paradoxically, it seems I can have huge impact. A decision to smile. Handing someone a loaf of bread. An hour on public transport to deliver donations. A weekend given over to a project that someone else is really interested in. Daily emptying of pockets into our Guest at Your Table box on the dining table. A pause and well-chosen words. The recipients of such gifts show immediately that these are not wasted gestures. And the degree of connectedness I feel with each such chosen action reveals the two-way benefit of social action. Often, there is an even wider impact, depending on who sees the action. I believe there is almost always a witness who is inspired to act in kind. I know that I am often inspired to change my behavior thanks to the example of another, whether it is someone in front of me, a memory of personal contact, or a real or fictional hero that I read about in a book.
This month, our UU Fellowship of Paris is focusing on Social Action and Social Justice. We can act as individuals in many arenas, and our newsletter and information table at our monthly service provide examples and ideas. Of course, we can sometimes have greater impact when we work in community, increasing the scale of our impact with numbers. Hence, we join together with the UU Service Committee on projects that have world-wide impact on Economic Justice, Civil Liberties and Environmental Justice. Locally, we contribute children's mittens, gloves and scarves to La Clarière, to help children in difficulty in the center of Paris. And we collect and distribute desired materials for a number of groups, from Europe to Africa to South America.
This December, our fellowship received holiday greetings from the UUA leadership--from the Rev. Peter Morales and the Rev. Eric Cherry. Their words struck me and I'd like to share them with you: "During this season, we are reminded of humanity's deep and enduring longing for peace. We understand that peace must be far, far more than merely the absence of war and violence. Peace is a relationship that we build upon the foundations of compassion, justice, respect, and conditions that allow human life to thrive. As we wish you peace this season, we also extend our hands in friendship and in partnership. Together let us continue our commitment to create a world where peace reigns."
Let us all add to the strong foundations of peace in the multitude of ways that we can.
In Fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
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President's Letter
November/December 2009
Sometimes when I go to a Sunday service, I’m looking for comfort, solace, a moment of peace. At last October’s service, the music was amazing and with it, a sermon that made me think, consider and smile; I felt good thanks to the message. But not so for others on that day, just as there have been other days in my life of "church-going" where I’ve gone home disturbed and unsettled about something that was said. Though some whom I have spoken with enjoyed listening to Mark Morrison-Reed’s rich voice and eloquent speaking, others were put off by his discussion of a personal god. Some loved the message. Others were shocked and offended by the reference to horrible people being welcomed into heaven by a god that does accept all, universally. (You can read the sermon and others here on the "Ministers & Sermons" page of our website.)
This panapoly of responses, this variety of reactions, is of course normal in any fairly large group of people. And the diversity of response also reflects, certainly, our varied backgrounds at the fellowship, and our commitment to independent thinking. We are individuals who come from numerous faith traditions, including lifelong Unitarians, a variety of Christian and non-Christian religious backgrounds, those who identify as humanists, and others who are atheists. But we all come together in a Unitarian Universalist fellowship because we share some important values, most of which are reflected in the seven “UU Principles” (More on these principles here on the "About UUism" page of our website.)
With young children, we often bring our UU Principles down to the simple: “Open mind, loving heart, and helping hands.” In adult language, two of the principles seem to correspond to the “Open mind” idea: “Acceptance of one another and encouragement to spiritual growth in our congregations” and “A free and responsible search for truth and meaning.” I know well from daily experience that the act of “acceptance” sounds fine, but when confronted with someone who says something you cannot relate to, it becomes a real challenge. And we then must decide how to respond. Do we listen? Do we argue? Do we defend? Do we ask questions? Do we leave? Do we laugh it off? Do we seek to understand what appears to be impossibly ridiculous? …What do we do with that experience of disagreement and un-ease?
Not only did October’s service stir up some excellent conversation, it also helped many of us to see our “chosen faith” with a broader lens. One person with whom I spoke commented that though he has been a member of our Unitarian Universalist Fellowship for ten years, it is only thanks to this recent sermon that he has a sense of what that “Universalist” part is all about. Though UUism doesn’t require a God -- or a belief in God -- for anyone, it does include this historical connection to “a religion of radical and overpowering love,” as Mark said in his sermon. Universal love and universal acceptance, for everyone. And this is clearly reflected in our principles, with our dedication to taking action ourselves, because of our belief in “The inherent worth and dignity of every person” and “Justice, equity and compassion in human relations.” High ideals; difficult to see how to act it out in our lives.
Interestingly, that universalist message came through loud and clear, with ideas about how to be an active participant in “radical love”, at the Fall EUU Retreat (European Unitarian Universalists; see the website at http://www.europeanuu.eu/) at the end of October. “What is the most important thing in your life?” Kate Braestrup, the theme speaker, spoke on love and through Saturday morning’s talk, created a broader picture than what the word “love” often conjures: one of simple action, being present for another…making someone else be the focus of our energy and attention for some time. There was the action of great love--what I can do in my little life, right now, any moment.
I hope that during these darker and colder months of the year, we all are able to find ways to participate in acting out love…agape, charity…for the good of all of us.
In Fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
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President's Letter
October 2009
Many moments in life seem very difficult lately, for me. No doubt others experience the same, some to a much greater degree than me. Sometimes, it is difficult to complete even the most basic and important of tasks. And then there are the interruptions! But the interruption that just presented itself to me, as I rush to work and try to finish three other things, was so perfect a reminder of what is important. My daughter asked why I wasn't gone to work yet, and when I replied that I had to do something, she whimpered in sympathy, walked up to me, and began to recite this week's poem, "La Cinquieme Saison" by Armand Monjo. The key line, at the end of a simple poem, reminds us that "La joie de vivre", the "love of life", permeates all moments. If we only notice that it is there. Life. We are alive.
May we all remember this in the worst of moments, and in the best. We are alive.
In Fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
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President's Letter
September 2009
Back in April of 2006, attending services with the UUFP for the first time, I knew little more than what a friend had told me, that I would probably appreciate the experience. And it was true. The music, the message of that day, the welcome, the general ambiance, the familiar church layout…I was "at church" and it felt good. I was drawn to return to services with my daughter and later, my husband, and for all of us, the monthly gathering has become an essential, nourishing part of our lives.
But also, after a couple of years of listening to announcements, reading newsletters, participating in groups, teaching children's RE – and now, taking on this major leadership role as president – I’m more and more aware of the different layers and centers of activity of our Paris Fellowship.
Though our monthly service is the fundamental attraction for many of us, there are numerous others who rarely or "never" come to services but are consistent and important contributors within various groups that are equally vital parts of UUFP. Some of us find our center in a Small Group Ministry – a place of deep listening and contemplation. Others of us seek the intellectual focus experienced through discussion of world religions and sacred texts in the "Wisdom Traditions" study group, or in the Book Discussion group. Some look forward to silent meditation within the Spiritual Practice Circle. The Young Adults regularly gather for discussion and social time before or after monthly services.
New groups are regularly born into our fellowship, such as the Dream Group that began this past year. And old courses become interesting for new sets of people… such as "Cakes for the Queens of Heaven" of the past year. Perhaps this year we’ll see a "Build Your Own Theology" workshop come to life, or a parent discussion group about Spirituality in Children. Every one of these groups forms an important core that supports and sustains individuals in their search for meaning in life. Each group and our monthly service provides individuals a chance to be in community to a greater or lesser degree, on a regular basis.
We all have our needs, our desires, our vision of what this Paris Fellowship should or could be, and the best of what we create together happens because, from time to time, one of us makes a proposal, finds others who share a passion, takes the time and puts in the energy to create a nucleus of action. And the comfort and nourishment we each depend on exists because regularly, a number of us devote time to make sure important organizational items get done on time, or we take time to be with others when they have particular needs.
Without a church staff to plan and organize and do for us, how is it that we can create, maintain, feed and constantly re-create our fellowship? It’s amazing and gratifying to realize that we just do it – you and me – because we want to. That’s all. It’s just us...but together.
As we plunge back into our busy 'school year' lives, I personally seek the grace to appreciate the different ways that others in my life are helping to create much of the good that I experience. And I hope to find the necessary energy for personal action, as well as silent space and trust that not acting is also sometimes an option.
In Fellowship,
Karen Kyker Frey
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President's Letter
June 2009
As my second year as President of UUFP draws to a close and I prepare to pass my responsibilities on to our incoming President, Karen Kyker Frey, I would like to thank all the members of the Executive Committee, the Committee Chairs and the many volunteers who have made my task easier.
Two changes of host church over two years have required a considerable level of adaptability and dedication on the part of our members. Change, even positive change such as our move to a permanent home within the city, can put considerable strain on any community, particularly when it has to deal with all the challenges we have faced over the past two years. In spite of the warm welcome we received in both of our host churches it has not been easy to cope with “church in a box” for two consecutive years. Fortunately, many willing hands made this easier and I would like to thank the people who carried and stored everything needed for our services and for the all-important refreshments following the service. I sincerely hope that next year we will have sufficient storage in our new home to accommodate all these items and that we will be able to unpack our adult’s and children’s libraries and the RE resource material all of which have been in storage for two years.
In spite of these difficult circumstances, our Fellowship has continued to grow this year and we will be welcoming new members at a membership ceremony during our June service.
When I was preparing my report for our Annual General Meeting in May I asked for reports from the various groups and committees which contribute to the vibrancy of our community. Although I am well aware of the many different groups which meet on a regular basis, I was still surprised and heartened to be reminded of how our Fellowship, like a tree with many branches, spreads far beyond the central core of our monthly worship meetings, to create new centres of spiritual and intellectual growth. This year saw two new ongoing workshops added to our “tree”: Cakes for the Queen of Heaven led by Pamela Leavy and a Dream Group led by Tiffany Urness. Tiffany will be leaving us in October to return to the USA. I hope that the Dream Group will find a new leader after Tiffany’s departure.
I am especially pleased that, under the leadership of Melanie Satterwhite, our young adults group, formed two years ago, is growing in both size and enthusiasm. The service they led in May was an inspiration and a joy. It is particularly important for our Fellowship that we have a thriving younger community to follow in the footsteps of those of us who are, as the French say “d’un certain âge”. I hope that, not only will our younger members follow in our footsteps but that their interest in UUFP will lead us down new, innovative paths.
Those of you who attended our Annual General Meeting on May 17 will surely agree with me that we have elected an outstanding Executive Committee to take over the helm for the 2009-2010 year. We have a perfect balance between long-term members, in our two Vice-Presidents, and newer, younger members in our President, Treasurer and Secretary. I am fully confident that we have taken on board the perfect crew to steer us out of the somewhat stormy waters of the past two years and, while maintaining continuity, put us on course towards increased stability, fellowship and, most importantly, growth.
Thank you all for your confidence in me and for your support over the past two years. Being president has been an interesting and rewarding experience but I have to admit that I am looking forward to being simply a member of our Fellowship next year!
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
May 2009
Editor's Note: This month our President, Margaret Wilson-Fuller, passes her "bully pulpit" to Betty Abugheida, UUFP Vice President and Social Justice Chair.
"Tradeoffs"
Those of you who had the pleasure of hearing the Reverend David Shaw at our last service know that our fellowship has been skirting around the question of environmental and social justice trade offs. The Reverend Shaw suggested that our environmental footprint should be balanced against the benefits gained by traveling and getting to know people of different cultures.
This year, your executive committee had to decide whether to go full steam ahead with social action projects or to pull back and support the Unitarian Universalist Service Committee which has had a shortfall of donations this year. We also put off giving the proceeds from an additional offertory to a second social justice project. In these times of decision-making, cutting back, and taking stock of our long range financial security, we need to think about other ways to personally implement UU principles and social justice needs.
Perhaps taking a stand when we hear intolerant remarks is an important part of social justice, formerly called social action. A simple "That has not been my experience" can put people on notice that you do not agree with what is being said without causing conflict and embarrassment. If the intolerant speaker asks why you say that, be prepared to give examples.
As said while presenting an honorary Doctor of Sacred Theology to our upcoming dream workshop presentor, the Reverend Jeremy Taylor, "You are an agent of social change, as radical and dedicated to your work as those who stand tall on the pages of our Unitarian Universalist history books. You have walked with us while pointing us in the direction of loving our neighbors as we love ourselves. Your life embodies the Unitarian Universalist first principle, which calls each of us to embrace the inherent worth and dignity of every person."
Let this message from the Star King School for the Ministry, to the Reverend Jeremy Taylor, be your goal, for without each person contributing to growth in understanding others, we will not be able to move the world to where it ought to be. A difficult task, but each person can push the spirit along. Keep pushing and shoving in a gentle way and we shall overcome intolerance.
Betty Abugheida
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President's Letter
April 2009
At one of our recent Small Group Ministry meetings we shared the following opening words by the Rev. Sue Ayer:
Spirit of Life and Love, we have gathered here in search of answers to hard questions.
We have come in search of understanding, in search of community.
We have come in search of hope and healing.
Let this be a place not only of searching, but of discovery.
Let this be a place not only of learning, but of wisdom.
Let this be a place not only of meeting, but of connection.
And let this be a place where healing fosters giving, and hope fosters service.
Based on this reading, we explored what hope means to us, when our sense of hope had been shaken and how we responded to the event which shook our sense of hope. We ended our gathering by sharing from what we draw hope in our personal lives.
Since what is said in our meetings is confidential I cannot share with you the thoughts which were shared but, when I return to the reading which opened our session, I realise that it expresses much of what I was seeking when I first attended a service of our Fellowship here in Paris. Before that service in May 1996, I had attended weddings in the Unitarian Church in Vancouver a couple of times but all I really retained from these occasions was that here was a church which welcomed believers and non-believers and had a very liberal approach to religion. An approach which reflected the origins of the word rather than the rigid interpretation generally attributed to it over the past few centuries and against which I had rebelled early in my young life.
Like many people who wander into a Unitarian Universalist service, I came to the Paris Fellowship out of curiosity. A couple of my friends had talked to me about a liberal group which met once a month in a church near the Place de la Bastille and which often had very interesting speakers who discussed topics of a philosophical nature. Since I had been “vaccinated” against organised religion by a Scottish Presbyterian education, I was not interested in finding a church but rather in expanding my horizons, meeting new people (I had only been in Paris for a few months) and finding a community where I felt welcome and comfortable. Over the years, being a UU has brought me much more than the above. I did indeed come “in search of community” but I have found so much more than I expected. Being a UU has helped me to “search for answers to hard questions”, a search which I suspect will continue as long as I am on this wonderful planet.
As it happened, at that first service I was very much in need of “hope and healing” as I had received some distressing news that week. It seemed that almost every word spoken, every hymn sung, struck a chord and I cried through a good part of the service. I was particularly grateful that this was accepted as perfectly natural, normal behaviour and that, at the subsequent coffee hour, people were kind and welcoming but did not pry into the reasons for my distress.
Twelve years later, UU continues to be a “place not only of searching, but of discovery”; “not only of learning but of wisdom”. Wisdom acquired through the wise words of many visiting ministers, through workshops and retreats. Through being a member of our Executive Committee I have learned about all the hard work done behind the scenes to keep our Fellowship alive and growing. As a member of our Caring Committee I have learned that what to me may seem to be a small gesture of kindness or support, a phone call or an email can make a big difference to the recipient. I have found that our Fellowship is “a place not only of meeting, but of connection”. I feel this connection at our monthly workshops and services when we come together to nurture our spirituality and seek “answers to hard questions”. I feel it when our Small Group meets and we share our joys and sorrows. I feel part of our church community when I reach out to members who may be having health or other problems. I feel part of the larger community through our charitable actions however small they may seem in the larger scheme of things. In our UU community I have found a haven “a place where healing fosters giving, and hope fosters service”.
My wish for us all is that we continue our journey of spiritual and intellectual growth together.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
March 2009
We often talk about UUs forming a community of people who are always ready to help and support each other and the wider community. This month, one of our long–time members, Maggie Goodwin, demonstrated this community spirit in spades following a call for help from your Executive Committee during their meeting last Saturday. On extremely short notice she took over from our editor whose computer crashed at newsletter time. Thanks to her, the newsletter has been compiled, proofed and sent out in full and on time. Thank you, Maggie.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
February 2009
Since our February workshop takes place on St Valentine’s Day, followed by our service on the 15th, I decided to do some research into the origins of this highly commercialised holiday, second only to Christmas in terms of the number of greeting cards bought.
I assumed that the day had its origins in Christianity and that it honoured a particular saint, perhaps the patron saint of love? However, the origins of this mysterious saint are far from clear. The Catholic Church recognises at least three saints named Valentine or Valentinus all of whom achieved sainthood through martyrdom. However, the feast day of St Valentine was removed from the Roman Catholic Calendar of Saints in 1969 and relegated to the status of local or national calendars because “nothing is known of Saint Valentine except that he was buried on the Via Flaminia on February 14th”.
There are several stories or legends about Saint Valentine, ranging from one in which, in defiance of Emperor Claudius II’s decision to outlaw marriage for his soldiers, Valentine continued to perform secret marriages for young soldiers and was sentenced to death for doing so. Another legend credits St Valentine with sending the first valentine. While in prison he is said to have fallen in love with a young girl to whom he sent a letter before his death. According to this legend he signed the letter “from your Valentine” which is, of course, the standard signature on modern Valentine’s cards.
As with many festivals which we celebrate today, Valentine’s Day has also been associated with a pagan festival, in this case the festival of Lupercalia which began on the ides of February (February 15th) in recognition of the official beginning of spring. In ancient Rome Lupercalia was regarded as a time for ritual purification in preparation for spring. Houses were swept; salt and spelt (a type of wheat) were sprinkled. This was a fertility festival dedicated to Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome. According to the legend, following the ritual slaying of a goat for fertility and a dog for purity and the subsequent ceremonies, the young women would put their names in a big urn and the young men would each draw the name of the woman who would be his partner for a year, or his wife.
It is hardly surprising that, given these legends, Saint Valentine came to be regarded as the patron of romance. By Medieval times with its tradition of courtly love, Saint Valentine was seen as the patron of love. Chaucer, in a poem honouring the 1st anniversary of the engagement of Richard II of England to Anne of Bohemia, refers to “seynt Volantynys day” and, in France, a “High court of love” was established on Saint Valentine’s Day in 1400. Interestingly the judges were chosen by women and one of the crimes judged was violence against women.
Given the reputation of the French in matters of love, it seems only fitting that the earliest surviving valentine was written by a Frenchman, the Duke of Orleans during his imprisonment in the Tower of London, to his wife:
“Je suis desja d’amour tanné
Ma tres doulce Valentinée”
In Britain, by the seventeenth century, Valentine’s Day was a popular celebration and in the eighteenth century, lovers and friends exchanged small gifts or letters expressing their affection. This custom was expanded with the arrival of printed greeting cards and inexpensive postal rates. For the typically reserved British man or woman, these cards provided an excellent way of expressing their feelings in a culture which discouraged visible expressions of affection.
It is interesting to note that in many countries throughout the world, in South America, the Middle East, in Scandinavia, there are similar festivals to the European and North American Valentine’s Day. Sadly, in western culture today, Valentine’s Day has suffered the fate of Christmas and Easter to become a yet another occasion for companies to sell us even more goods which we do not need in the form of garish cards decorated with satin hearts, heart–shaped boxes of chocolates of dubious quality or teddy bears carrying a velvet heart bearing the declaration “I love you”. We are urged to show our love by buying jewellery, perfume, chocolates, by taking our loved ones out to fancy restaurants to show our affection. In this year of financial crisis, perhaps we will return to simpler, less costly and perhaps more sincere ways of showing our love and affection for those dear to us.
I wish you all a Valentine’s weekend filled with love, friendship and sincerity.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
January 2009
As we enter a new year, precursor of the second decade of the second millennium, it would be easy to throw up our hands in despair at the magnitude of the problems facing our planet. Economic gloom and doom, poverty, lack of opportunity for education, slavery, famine, war, piracy, global warming, these are the daily offerings of our newspapers and news broadcasts.
Fortunately, there are some glimmers of hope on the horizon in the form of the multitude of organisations dedicated to helping those less fortunate than themselves. For Unitarians, the most important of these is the UUSC which works tirelessly to improve the lot of people in different corners of the world and which depends on our contributions, through GAYT and other donations, to continue its vital work. On a smaller scale, we have the UUFP Social Justice Committee through which we contribute to different causes throughout the year. The list of projects which we could support is quite overwhelming and seems to grow exponentially. But, as the saying goes, even if we only add a drop to the ocean, at least it is one more drop.
Over the past year I have met three people who, by their individual effort, have added their drop to the ocean through the gift of education. Last year, my old neighbour and friend and her husband, both retired Canadian educators, volunteered four months of their time to sit on a selection committee to allow 40 Kenyan students to receive bursaries to attend university. Over four hundred hopeful young people applied and the committee eventually managed to squeeze 45 grants out of their budget with my friends personally helping one additional student.
During their stay in Kenya, they were invited to visit some of the students’ villages where they were struck by the lack of the most basic of requirements for human health: a clean water supply. In one particular village, the water trickled out of a hose pipe which descended a muddy hill contaminated with sewage. My friends decided that they would make sure that at least this village would have a clean water supply. They wrote to family and friends in Canada soliciting donations for their project, and set about working with the villagers to design and build the facility. To cut a long story short, the entire village participated in the project, carrying stones, cutting channels, installing pipes and woe betide any villager who did not buckle down to help. One woman found this out the hard way when, having been told “no work, no right to draw water”, she tried to sneak some water and was thoroughly scolded by the self–appointed leader of the women’s work squad. Needless to say, the offender turned out to work after that!
I should add that, the committee my friends belonged to was associated with schools which had been set up, one at a time through the determination of a Canadian school teacher who saw the need for free education in a country where “no uniform” meant no school. Thus families too poor to buy uniforms for their children were deprived of the possibility of education and the possibility to break a vicious circle of ignorance and poverty.
The other person whom, serendipitously, I heard speak at the Edinburgh Book Festival last August and subsequently met, is Greg Mortenson, the co–author of Three Cups of Tea, a book which I recommended to you last year and which was the subject of our Book Discussion Group on January 3rd. Greg has demonstrated, on a large scale, just how much one person can achieve, through sheer courage, self sacrifice and an incredible amount of dedication.
Following a failed attempt to climb K2, Greg—lost, dehydrated and disorientated—stumbled into a remote, impoverished Pakistani village where he was taken in and nursed back to health by the villagers. When he asked the villagers how he could thank them for their kindness, the reply was “please build us a school.” At the time Three Cups of Tea was written, his Central Asia Institute had built 55 schools in the remotest areas of Pakistan and even in Afghanistan. When he spoke in Edinburgh last August, they had built over 80 schools.
I am not suggesting that we are all made of the stuff of a Greg Mortenson, but, at a time when we could well give way to despair over the state of the world, people like him are a true inspiration to us to do what little we can to help improve the lot of our fellows on this earth, bearing in mind that even one little drop in the ocean can make a difference.
With my best wishes to our members and friends for a happy, healthy and fulfilling year in which we all make a difference, however small, to our troubled world.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
December 2008
We cannot ignore it no matter how hard we try – that season is upon us once more. It arrives earlier and earlier each year like all the other over-commercialised holidays (originally holy days), the religious significance of which has largely disappeared under an avalanche of advertising and incitements to buy, buy, buy. Everywhere I look, on TV, the radio, Internet, on the street, in the Metro, in newspapers and magazines, flyers in my mailbox … I am bombarded with messages urging me to spend, spend, spend.
In the present economic climate most of us are pausing and thinking before spending any of our hard-earned money. But, how can those of us who enjoy celebrating this traditional holiday by seeing or getting in touch with our friends and family through cards and gifts do so without getting get drawn into the near hysterical buying frenzy that characterises the winter holiday season?
Does Aunt Fanny really need another coffee maker, teapot, pretty but obscenely expensive ornament? Will our children, grandchildren, nephews and nieces treasure this toy with all its bells and whistles which undoubtedly will cease to work and be relegated to the bottom of the toy box before the New Year is rung in? Perhaps we need to rethink our gift-giving this year.
I am not suggesting that we stop giving gifts to our nephews, nieces and grandchildren or to our families and friends. We don’t want to disappoint children who have been looking forward to Santa’s visit for what seems like months to them. However, this year we could choose their gifts more carefully, avoiding the over commercialised “in” toys and looking for gifts the purchase of which will contribute to those who most need it rather than to the swelling coffers of some gigantic corporation.
I have a few ideas to share with you on how to enjoy the holiday and ensure those around us enjoy it too while contributing to those less fortunate than ourselves.
For the children there are several charities, such as UNICEF, which provided the doctor’s kit I gave to my great nephew last year, have catalogues of cards and gifts and are also present in some stores (I got mine at a certain “assemble your own furniture” store).
For those of us who are good with our hands, and even those, like me who cannot draw a house convincingly, we can give simple home-made gifts. If, like me, you are artistically challenged, there are other low-cost options. I once belonged to a group where we were each asked to draw a name then give a gift made by ourselves to that person. As luck would have it, I drew the name of the group leader. What could I give her that I had made myself and which would show how much I had appreciated her leadership? My solution was to go out and buy some beautiful handmade paper, then print out several of the poems I had written, and bind them into a little booklet tied with ribbon. She loved it! If you don’t write, choose some of your favourite poems, a favourite story, a selection of favourite quotations, copy them on pretty paper, bind them, and, hey presto, an environmentally friendly, low-cost, personalised, gift.
Charitable organisations such as UNICEF, the World Wildlife Foundation, or the UUSC all support very worthwhile charities and I am sure you can all add others to this short list. We know that, due to the financial crisis, donations to UUSC and presumably to other charitable organisations are down. All these organisations have websites with catalogues of gift ideas and Seasons Greeting cards. So, instead of buying yet another useless tea cosy, jar of hand cream, or fancy pen, why not choose a gift from one of these catalogues? Better still, for friends who really do not need anything this year, send a donation to one of these charitable organisations or to another of your choice in the name of your friend in lieu of a gift. Send them a card (preferably one part of the purchase price of which goes to a charity) telling them you have done this.
Whether you will be travelling to spend the holidays with family and friends or staying in Paris, I wish you all a very happy holiday season and that you enter the New Year in good health physically and spiritually. For those of you who will be in Paris, don’t forget our annual holiday dinner on December 25.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
November 2008
I and several of our members have just returned from the EUU Fall retreat in Traben-Trarbach, Germany. As always, I returned from the retreat refreshed, spiritually and physically, in spite of the very full programme. I never cease to be amazed at how much we pack into a short weekend and I always come back feeling as if I have been away for much longer.
In her talk on Saturday morning, our guest speaker, the Reverend Jill McAllister, discussed the Brahma-Viharas, “the four states of mind and heart which are the foundations of real love”. One of the translations of the term Brahma-Viharas is, Brahma: best; Vihara: dwelling or home. These combined are Jill’s preferred translation of the term Brahma-Viharas: “our best home”. Thus, one of the key questions posed during the weekend and the topic of the Sunday service was, “What is home?”
Like many of you, I have been a wanderer for most of my adult life, living in some 20 “homes” over the past 40 years and therefore I had some difficulty deciding where or what “home” is when the question was posed at the service. I finally came to the conclusion that where I feel at “home” is where I have made my nest at the moment, where, my sons’ photos are on the dresser, where my books and all my familiar pictures and objects are. However, “home” is also where my friends, my work and my community are.
This expanded definition brings me to the UUFP community which has been my spiritual home and my community for the past 12 years. Why do I feel at home here? Because of our liberal faith? Because no-one tells me what I should believe? (as if one can believe to order). Because UUFP has opened up new avenues of thought and spirituality to me? Because I feel safe and uncriticised here? Because in our small group meetings I feel free to talk frankly about my joys and sorrows? I would have to say the answer is all of the above and probably more.
Of course, belonging to a community or a family implies that there is a relationship between that person and their community or family which in turn implies commitment. We cannot simply take what we need from that community or family, we also need to give back to it in order for it to flourish and grow and to flourish and grow ourselves. That is one reason why, once I had joined our fellowship I became more active in it, first of all by organising after service refreshments and helping out in other ways and later by agreeing to stand for Vice President then President.
We can all contribute to our community in some way even if it is just by giving a friendly welcome to a newcomer or visitor to our monthly service, offering to shop for someone who is ill, helping out on one of our committees from time to time. Do you have a particular interest or skill which you could volunteer to share with our community or use to help an individual member? Could you help out by donating an hour or two of your time to help with some of our projects such as Guest at Your Table? Teach an RE class so that our RE teacher can attend a service?
Of course, with the launch of our Pledge Drive at our November service, you will be able to contribute financially and help meet our budget by pledging to give as generously as possible so that our community can continue to grow and thrive.
I am writing this on November 4th a very significant day for the Americans in our congregation and I felt that, in the current world climate, this meditation from the EUU retreat is very appropriate:
May I be free from fear, may I be safe
May I be happy, may I be healthy
May I be at peace.
May you be free from fear, may you be safe
May you be happy, may you be healthy
May you be at peace.
May all beings be free from fear, may all be safe
May all beings be happy, may all be healthy
May all beings be at peace.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
October 2008
Greetings from Vancouver where the weather has suddenly turned autumnal after almost a month of glorious weather.
I attended the service in the Vancouver Unitarian Universalist Church on Sunday September 28th and lit a candle for our fellowship which, with the 9-hour time difference, would already have held its first service in our new home.
The Vancouver service was led by the church minister, the Reverend Steven Epperson with the reading and address by the Reverend Brian Kiely, president of the International Council of Unitarian Universalists (ICUU). Rev. Kiely will be the featured speaker at the EUU Spring Retreat in Spa, Belgium and has agreed to lead a service for our Fellowship before the retreat. His presence at the service was a serendipitous coincidence for me.
The Reverend Kiely’s reading was from the blog he wrote during his stay in Kenya as a member of the Faculty at the International Council of Unitarians and Universalists Leadership Conference in Nairobi in February, 2008. Brian’s blog is available on the ICUU web site. I highly recommend you log onto it as it makes for fascinating and inspiring reading.
In spite of living in what we westerners would consider poverty and deprivation where an “every man for himself” attitude could easily reign, the Kenyan Unitarians whom Brian met are strongly committed to each other and to the larger community. For them, being a Unitarian is less about worship and spiritual growth than about helping others. This manifests itself in numerous projects, from feeding 100 children a hot lunch every day, to orphanages for the children of AIDS victims, to schools run by volunteers. One young, unemployed father of an infant has taken in 8, yes EIGHT orphaned children.
The Kenyan theme continued the day after the service through one of those coincidences which Jung would have described as an example of synchronicity. I visited friends, a retired schoolteacher and her husband, a retired school superintendent who, in 2007, spent 4 months in Kenya volunteering for a Canadian charity (ACCES). ACCES provides schooling for children whose families are too poor to pay school fees or buy the mandatory uniforms: no uniform = no school. They were part of a committee entrusted with the task of selecting 45 high school students who would receive scholarships to attend university. The original number of applicants was 450! Even after weeding out those who failed to meet the basic criteria, their task was, to say the least, daunting and at times heart rending. In the end, the committee managed to stretch the number of scholarships to 48.
In addition to their scholarship selection duties, my friends visited surrounding villages and, shocked by the unsanitary conditions of one village’s water supply, decided to contribute funds and raise money from their friends in Canada to provide a source of clean water for the villagers. There followed a true community project with all the villagers, men, women and children working together, carrying stones and rocks, digging channels, mixing cement, laying pipes, etc. to help bring the project to fruition. One villager provided and cooked the midday meal for those working on the project, one of the women appointed herself supervisor of the women warning them that, if they did not work on the project they would not be allowed to collect water and soundly scolding one young woman who was not contributing. I have copies of the slides of the project if anyone would like to see them.
The accounts of these people’s experiences have left me humbled, grateful for what I have and inspired to work with our fellowship on doing what we can, individually or as a group to help bring education, clean water, healthcare, all the things which we take for granted, to those so much less fortunate than ourselves.
So, as we enter the fall season, let’s come up with some ideas on how our fellowship can make a difference.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
September 2008
As most of us return from summer holidays and go back to work, school and leisure activities, we again face the challenge of moving to a new “home” in the Temple de Pentemont in Paris.
Some of you may be aware that there is a historical link between the Temple de Pentemont and Unitarianism in that Thomas Jefferson chose the convent school, for which the building housing our new church was the chapel, for his daughter’s education when he lived in Paris.
While I am sure our members will be happy to be back “intro muros” we will again have to get to know a new home, figure out metros, buses or parking, interact with a new church community and adapt to a change in the time of our service. All these changes can be a little unsettling but I am sure that, just as we adapted to our year of “church in a box” in Neuilly, we will soon settle comfortably into our new home. The later time will enable us to have lunch or perhaps to meet for brunch before the service and will make our traditional after-service coffee hour easier to organise.
In 2005, the Temple de Pentemont merged with the Paris Luxembourg church on the rue Madame to form the Eglise Réformée de Pentemont-Luxembourg. As a result, not only do we have more room for RE in the Temple de Pentemont, we can also rent space in the rue Madame church building. We have already put this into practice by booking a large room with a fully equipped kitchen in the rue Madame building for our annual Thanksgiving pot-luck dinner in November. Since there are several rooms of various sizes available for rent in that building, we should be able to plan other activities throughout the year and, over the long term, will have lots of scope for growth.
As our Fellowship enters a new phase in its life, I too am preparing to enter a new phase in mine - retirement. Although I have been advised by those already treading this path that one can find oneself even busier in retirement than when one was working, I am looking forward to this new stage in my life and to having more time for my various interests including my role as president of UUFP. I look forward to exchanging ideas with our members and friends about possible projects for this year and beyond.
Unfortunately, I will not be with you for our first service on September 28th as I am currently with my son and daughter-in-law in Vancouver, Canada. However, the Fellowship is in the capable hands of our Executive committee, particularly our Vice Presidents, Betty AbuGheida and Neil Smith and, with Birthe Stein and Dorcy Erlandson co-ordinating our first service, I am sure everything will run smoothly and, of course, thanks to the Internet, I am only an e-mail away from you all.
My thoughts will be with you on the 28th when I plan to attend the Unitarian Universalist Church in Vancouver and light a candle for our Fellowship in its new home.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
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President's Letter
June 2008
As our year in Neuilly draws
to a close and many of us prepare to set off on holiday, to visit family and
friends in our country of origin, explore new horizons or revisit a favourite
holiday spot and in my case, preparing for retirement, we can look back on our
year of “church in a box” with pride and a sense of accomplishment.
It took a true team effort to ensure that everything needed for our services
and coffee hours arrived safely for each service and was packed up and taken
away afterwards. I’d like to thank all those who throughout the year have
patiently stored and carried to and from the church, greeters’ materials,
brochures, coffee hour supplies, our chalice, candles and the many other items
which make our monthly meetings truly ours. It has not always been easy, there
has been the occasional moment of panic: “What do you mean, there’s
no coffee left!” “There’s candle wax all over the tablecloth”
Where’s the children’s chalice?” type of emergency but we
handled them, perhaps not always in a Zen fashion, but we handled them.
I am sure that you have
all enjoyed our year in the Eglise Réformée de Neuilly as much
as I have and join with me in thanking our host church for allowing us to share
their lovely sanctuary. While attendance at some of our services was down, presumably
because of the change of location, we have welcomed many visitors and new friends
and increased our membership this year. I will take away many happy memories
from Neuilly: our first service in September with the Reverend Jim Robinson
whom we will be welcoming back for our first service in our new church, our
Christmas lay service, the very moving January service, having a new minister,
the Reverend David Shaw lead an inspiring workshop and service in April, last
month’s introduction to Buddhism, not to mention many pleasant coffee
hours spent chatting to visitors and newcomers.
I am also sure that, like
me, you are looking forward to our move back into Paris but are probably also
a little sad to leave the little church which, after a year, feels familiar
to us, feels a little bit like home.
In her sermon entitled “The
Gift of a Year” at our October service, the Reverend Gretchen Thomas’
urged us to make full use of this transitional year and not to just “fill
in time” till we move to our new home. One of her suggestions was to become
involved with our host church and their projects. We did this by attending some
of their services and a few of us were guests at their “rentrée”
lunch. Members of our Executive Committee and other members attended their service
on May 18th and on May 30th and 31st we had a very well–stocked baked
goods table at their annual church sale and donated the proceeds to their charitable
fund.
Moving again in September
will be a challenge but I am sure we will settle quickly into our new home and
I am particularly happy that our September service will again be led by the
Reverend Jim Robinson. In the meantime, I wish you all a very happy summer break
and look forward to seeing you in the fall in our new home.
In Fellowship,
Margaret Wilson-Fuller
